Ladies, we need to have a little chat.
I’m sure it will come as no surprise to you that this quarter’s performance report is a positive one. You’re becoming leaders in the work place, closing the wage gap with your confident attitudes (slowly but surely), and stopping cat-callers in their tracks. I’m very impressed with how you’ve done thus far as a part of this corporation we like to call society, however there is one area where we still see things as lacking.
I need you to pick up the social slack, ladies. Asking a guy out on a date takes confidence, self-esteem, and overcoming the fear of rejection. I need you ladies to prove you have a set of steal ovaries and date with confidence. If you want men to stop objectifying you, take an active role in your dating life and stop turning yourself into an object. Objects patiently wait for somebody to pull them off a shelf at their heart’s content. Turn the tables and pull him off his shelf for once. Here’s how I recommend you go about it.
Have some confidence in yourself:
Yes, the fear of rejection is quite real and very possible. Accept that he may shoot you down, but chances are he’ll be so surprised that you’re asking him out he’ll be turned on by your confidence. In fact, he’s going to be so into your confidence that his answer will undoubtedly be a resounding “yes!!” when you ask him to hang out.
Do not ask him to hang out:
I realize I’m contradicting myself here. Allow me to rephrase: DO NOT JUST ask him to hang out. Matthew Hussey, sexy British man and author of Get The Guy, has some wonderful advice on this subject that I’ve used multiple times and it has yet to let me down. Rather than simply saying, “would you like to hang out sometime,” go instead for more definitive. For example, “I’m going to be writing at Starbucks. Meet me there at 6 tonight for a cup of coffee so you can tell me more about the time you wrestled a walrus.”
Say this over text message and you’re golden, Ponyboy. Not only are you telling him what to do, which guys seem to like quite a bit, you’re keeping it casual and letting him know you’re just doing work and if he wants to join you, he can. Your confidence will shake him in the best ways.
This is about you:
The purpose of dating isn’t to parade yourself in front of a man and hope he likes you enough to marry you. The purpose of dating is to assess his character and personality and see if it aligns with yours. Is he somebody who will make a suitable life partner (if that’s what your looking for), a fun fling, or your best friend with benefits?
Remember, this isn’t about making him like you. This about about discovering whether or not he’s worthy of your time. Have fun with it. The worst that can happen is rejection. And remember: rejection builds confidence and helps you in the long run.
Happy Flirting!
[Featured Image Credit: Huffington Post]