26 Things Everybody (Except You) Is Doing This Autumn

Fall is the perfect season. It’s not too hot and not too cold.

But don’t let the scientists fool you, friends. Fall doesn’t happen because the Earth is moving away from the sun this time of the year, determined by the physics of our solar system. The Earth is moving away from the sun because because the sun has zero chill and Earth knows if it wants to take some perfect selfies, it needs a little more chill.

Therefore, that majestic beast we call Earth created Autumn solely so it would have a perfect season for Instagram. Naturally, everybody else on this planet is reaping those benefits (except you) and living out the Fall exactly as they should be.

Here’s what the rest of us are doing during the chillest season of the year:

1. Being cute while drinking our Pumpkin Spiced Lattes topped with whipped cream.
2. Getting an adorable dollop of whipped cream on our noses that makes us look quirky, yet attractive.
3. Having an equally attractive stranger walk up to us, notice the dollop of whipped cream, and wipe it off in a non-creepy way.
4. Exchanging phone numbers with the stranger outside the coffee shop.
5. Finding perfectly crunchy leaves to step on.
6. Building a fire with dry wood and leaves, despite the massive amounts of rain that have been pouring down lately.
7. Dyeing our hair the perfect shade of auburn for the winter, with just enough brown in it that it doesn’t look like it came from a box.
8. Mastering the art of layering.
9. Wearing leggings with boots and a sweater without becoming too hot and having sweat drip down our cleavage while we walk to class.
10. Discovering unique sweaters that look retro but not like something you found in your Grandma’s closet.
11. Getting lost in a corn maze with that attractive stranger from the coffee shop.
12. Running into our friends in the corn maze and laughing at the quirks and ironies life often throws our way.
13. Hitting it off with coffee shop guy who happens to love our friends, by the way.
14. Bundling up and going to the beach to build yet another bonfire.
15. Sitting around a campfire, roasting marshmallows and sharing stories about our adventurous and spectacular lives.
16. Snuggling under a blanket with the guy from the coffee shop.
17. Delicately eating apple cider doughnuts. Getting no cinnamon sugar residue on our fingers, cheeks or chin. Getting cinnamon sugar only on our lips. The cinnamon sugar is then kissed off by the coffee shop guy.
18. Looking good in a hat.
19. Growing a beard that would put all other men to shame.
20. Curling the end of our mustache up in a perfect twirl and then Instagramming that fantastic ‘stache.
21. Picking up an acorn cap and whistling the perfect “toot” into it.
22. Planning a trip to the lake that just happens to align with the last warm day of the season. We didn’t even intend for that to happen. Life just works out like that for us, sometimes.
23. Looking into the lake and seeing a perfect mirror in the sky.
24. Feeling the nostalgia of both life, and this everlasting moment.
25. Appreciating everything authentic that has happened in this eternal present. Thanking the spirit of the universe and feeling at peace with life around us.
26. Instagramming this moment because it isn’t real if the proof ain’t on Instagram.

[Featured Image Credit: ForWallpaper.com]