Entering the college scene for the first time is nerve-racking, exciting, stressful, and fun. Like the great philosopher Taylor Swift once said, “we’re happy, free, confused, and lonely in the best way. It’s miserable and magical, oh yeah.”
And while you may not yet be twenty-two, eighteen isn’t much different. When you enter the new realm of college, you aren’t just in a new place, you’re in a new social group. There will be different norms that push the group in one direction or another and people are more open-minded than you were used to in the past. People are also a lot more close-minded in other ways.
This time of your life is about exploring yourself in a new surrounding and finding out more about who you are. My freshman year was a very painful transition, but a good learning experience. If only I had somebody to give me the advice that I’m about to give you.
Finding friends is more important that finding somebody just to “go out” with.
In college, it’s so easy to fall into a group of people with whom you have no mutual interests. Don’t let your friends be the people you show up to the party with, chat with, and then disperse from to find more interesting people to spend the night with. Focusing on making valuable friends is an important thing to do when you’re new to the college scene. And the most important person you can befriend on campus is your Resident Assistant (RA).
If you live on campus, you will have an RA and you want to be their friend. As a former RA, I can tell you, it was in my resident’s best interests to befriend me. Here’s why…
Your RA has a lot of connections:
I hate to toot my own horn here, but RA’s are over-achievers. It’s the most demanding job/activity on campus. RA’s spend a full week with all the other RA’s bonding, training, and building connections. That’s a whole network of over-achieving friends, all of whom are president of their Fraternity, involved in student government, part of the radio station, or doing all three.
If you want to get involved on campus, especially with an activity that is semi-exclusive (like Greek life), your RA will certainly have some valuable connections that can help you.
When the RA busts you for drinking, you want to be their friend:
RA’s drink underage. They drink in the building. They even drink with residents in the building (rarely, but it has happened). However, their job is also to bust people for drinking. If you’re having a mellow night in the building or a huge rager, you do not want your first encounter with the RA to be when they’re writing you up.
Befriend them early and make it clear you’re a well-rounded friendly person who enjoys the social aspects of college. They too enjoy the social aspects of college and having some kind of connection with them won’t ensure you get out of trouble, but it certainly won’t hurt.
RA’s have great advice:
Having been through the tough transition into college, I know about the struggle of adjusting. I found out for myself which activities were worth becoming a part of and which should have been passed up. I learned the hard way that senior boys who show interest in freshman girls rarely have good intentions and I also learned the best way to get hired as an RA (and receive free housing) was to befriend current RAs.
Having a resource as a friend is valuable and highly beneficial to your college experience. I assure you, this is one friendship you do not want to pass up.
[Featured Image Credit: Talk Nerdy 2 Me]