I recently went to see one of my favorite bands and I had a very sobering realization: I’m getting too old for this.
Everybody gets to a point in their life when staying home on the couch is more fun than doing literally anything else on Earth. I have yet to get to this point, but I’m on my way there.
I love going out, I love spending time with friends, and I love trying new things. But unfortunately, I think I’ve peaked as far as my concert going days are concerned. If you agree with the following five statements, it’s possible you’re in the same boat as me.
1. You stand closer to the bar than to the stage
Have enough room the erst your arm on the bar, sip a beer, and spread out? Yes I think that sounds more appealing than being kicked in the head and thrown in every direction.
The bar is where the space is accompanied with beer. It’s a no-brainier for me. Of course, I might have been one of the few people at that concert that could even drink legally.
2. You want to go to a show that has actual chairs (maybe even popcorn)
You’re too old to even stand at the bar. You want to sit in a leather studded arm chair with your feet up, a beer in hand, a bowl of popcorn, and your cat. Fuzzy slippers would be nice too, but they aren’t necessary.
3. You show up only for the band that you like
While the young kids are coming in early to sit in a circle on the floor (I did that once when I was 16), it’s the adults that roll in at the start of the actual show when the band they actually came to see goes on stage.
If you’re rolling in before the doors open, it’s because your Mom dropped you off. If you’re rolling in during the first few bands. maybe you’re looking for new music and a good spot.
and if you’re like me, you’re rolling in just as your band goes on stage so you can so straight to your spot at the bar.
4. Crowd surfers infuriate you
People always tell me crowd surfers are part of the experience, but clearly those people have never been kicked in the face during their favorite bands set. Maybe they’ve never had to leave the show because their nose was bleeding profusely, and maybe they didn’t spend the evening in the ER.
If you’ve been to enough shows, you’ve had your share of injuries, and you’ve learned crowd-surfers are the spawn of Satan.
5. You just aren’t that into it
Yup, you are one step closer to reaching that day in life where you sit down on the couch, and you never get back up. Congratulations, we’ve been waiting for you.
[Featured Image Credit: Montecruz Foto via Flickr]